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Thursday, January 3, 2013

2 worlds

I have known two worlds in my upbringing ; the rich and the poor.

I'm neither.

I went to a school where in my opinion, was filled with spoilt b**ches students from higher class society (please don't get offended, it may not apply to you). Those who lived around the area was mostly datuk and datin, if not, wealthy businessmen.

Again, my family is neither.

I went to that particular school simply because despite the people, it was and still is a good school. And also because my grandparents live nearby. They owned the house even before the school existed. They lived there since like probably during the end of the mesopatamia era.

But peer pressure was on. And even up to this day, it still is on.

At school the girls would probably be like, hey look at my roxy bag and now, when I got back from France, they would be like hey, did you get a longchamp? Then, I just remained silent, trying to dodge whoever who may ask such question.

I'm ashamed to say that sometimes I do get caught in this $$ trap. Money spent like river flows.

Now that I'm a working woman (I flinch calling myself a woman, I still feel like a girl), I know how hard to earn money. And when I look at those other women, I can't help but feeling envious to the point of being jealous. Life comes easy for them, having wealthy parents a big plus (especially when you're planning a wedding and I know a lot whose parents basically pay for their wedding) and work is easy as well since they can just work at their parents' company.

I struggle to keep a low paid job and I struggle to manage everything on my own. Sometimes I stumble and pushing myself to stand again is ever so tiring. I worry and worry over my financial status and I worry about my future. At times I wonder if my worry would be endless.

That's all I wanted to babble about. I'm afraid if I go on, someone might puke while saying, as if you're the only person with worries in this world.

I wish to end this post by saying, guys I lost my precious phone. I suspect it was stolen. So please contact me using my digi number meanwhile I look for a replacement;, though I don't think anyone care to contact me.

Oh, and happy new year...


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